"Standing 80 Feet" off the ground and racing 55 miles per hour

My ticket has been stamped. My seat belt has been fastened. The conductor tells us to keep our hands and feet in the cart at all times and the whistle blows. Now our cart begins to move up on what seems to be the biggest mountain that I have ever climbed. The wind is so gentle as it brushes against my face and blows my hair from side to side. The fresh smell of the outdoors is comforting. As I take a deep breath and say a silent prayer I look around and notice that we had finally made it to the top of the mountain that we were climbing. I quickly grab the bar in front of me and hold on as tight as I possibly can. Here we go... the wind is now gushing hard toward my face and I cannot keep my eyes open. I begin to scream a little because of excitement but alot because of fear. Fear of not be able to control what may happen or the fear of the unknown.

As I stepped on this roller coaster months ago I knew what I was up against. I knew that I wasn't in control and that it would make me so nervous. I knew that the track would take sharp turns, would turn upside down, would sometimes go slow and sometimes it would go fast. I knew that I wouldn't know the path of the roller coaster. I know this ride will eventually end. It has to stop sometime... right?? 

Many of you have mentioned the lengths you have gone through to help us with a baby. You have shared our profile with counselors, other adoption agencies, friends, or even people you may not know.. Thank you for your support. I believe at least once a week we hear about a potential birth mom here or there. When I say it is a roller coaster.. it has been. Will one of these birth moms pan out? We have given our phone number, should we follow up if we do not hear anything? Are we prepared, do we have a car seat and what about diapers? Will we have time to get everything in order? These are the thoughts that have swarmed my brain lately and here I am buckled in tightly on this roller coaster of adoption. 

Many of you ask me if I want to know details about the birth mother that you are talking too. You are trying to guard our hearts and worry that we may get our hopes up. Honestly, I am on this roller coaster..ain't I? I know what I am up against. I know what this means. I know it will happen sometime and I know the ride will be bumpy. I will cry, I will laugh, I will smile, and I will worry. But know I am not in this alone. 

My hope is built on nothing less than Jesus' blood and righteousness. 

I dare not trust the sweetest frame, but wholly lean on Jesus' name.

Even though this roller coaster seems like it is out of control, God is the conductor and He knows this track. He knows when to go fast, when to go slow. He knows when the cart will go upside down, and He knows how to take those sharp turns. So as I stay seated, hands and feet remaining in the cart at all times..I will let God take care of me and enjoy this ride. 

Jeremiah 29:11New Living Translation (NLT)

11 For I know the plans I have for you,” says the Lord. “They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope.