I have Exposed my Feet and boy do I need a Pedicure

Yesterday I hit my first rough patch and I am not talking about falling on the ice. I am truly thankful that God is keeping me home bound during this time so I can heal and spend more time with Him as I go through this spiraling rollercoaster ride. Well I am broken and hurt and I told myself I would not write to you when I felt this way but the Lord has asked me to share this. I am a very strong person. I put my faith and trust in God for everything and because of that I have always been strong. I remember as a teenager as tragic things happened to my family, I was always the one who held our family together. I was the one who comforted them as they cried, encouraged them to have faith, and prayed for each of them as they went through it.

Well today I feel like I have went through a tragedy and I need people to gather round to comfort me as I cry, encourage me to have faith, and to pray for me. I haven't really ever experienced rejection. If I ever wanted something I got it, I have really never been told No, and I don't really know what is means to be in last place. Yes I am very competitive and I do not like to lose. I am so aware of this that I typically do not put myself in situations where I could lose. I would only enter myself in competitions of things I was good at, I would only apply for jobs that I would get, and I plan events around my talents and skills. Things have always went my way and were perfectly done. Yes I too am a perfectionist. I feel like my competitive and perfect nature go hand in hand. It is a blessing and a curse. If you want to win or if you want to have someone who can make sure all the details are perfect, then I am one of the best members on your team. On the other hand, if you are playing for fun and your motto is everyone is a winner, then please do not put me on your team. I am being honest here. I am not proud that I have a sore loser of an attitude, this is just how I am. God has used this gift in me for many things and I know he will still use this to glorify Him.

Today I realize that God is using what I call my gift but what He calls my fault to teach me a lesson. He is starting to humble me and to remind me that you cannot win at everything. And why must everything be a competition anyways. Mark 9:35 says "anyone who wants to be first must be the very last, and the servant of all." I have been reminded that Jesus reverses the rank. The person who is most important to him is not the person seeking the status or popular vote. The most important person is like Jesus himself: willing to give up their rank and status. For Jesus, last means first in service and first in the eyes of God. So here I am in last place,having a great life, and ready to serve. 

God please help me to be more like you and use my fault of competition and perfection to glorify you. Keep me in last place as long as you like. Because I know Your grace is sufficient even for Krista, and that Your power is made perfect in my weakness. Friends read that last sentence and insert your name. Because I know you may be hurting and broken too. But God is working on this puzzle and He has his hands on your broken puzzle piece and He in His time will put those broken pieces back together soon.

I have some awesome friends and I wanted to leave you with some of their encouraging words in hopes it may encourage you today! So just like Taylor Swift if you say or do something with me it may end up in a song or blog. Until next time grace and peace...."God is at work in your life. He knows your heart and I believe He is hurting with you." "Rest assured things are going on in the background that you can't see. Trust not in what your eyes see but in what is unseen." "I can't imagine the roller coaster of emotions, but God knows and I can't wait to hear the end of the story when He weaves it all back together." "It's hard to see it when you're in the midst of the storm'but the sun always comes out." "We are made in His image and He is strong." "Hey Lightening McQueen didn't win the race, and looked what he learned."