even though I "Walk through the Valley of the Shadow of Death"

 

Here is the continuation of my story.....

 

After the initial shock of the diagnoses settled, Krista and I had no other choice but to work with the hand God gave us. My faith was shaken but not gone. Deep down I knew that God had a reason for this current slump. I was always reminded of II Corinthians 12:9-11.  ⁹ But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me.  ¹⁰  For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities.  For when I am weak, then I am strong. In my weakness there He was. 

  From time to time I felt lost, distant, as if no one would understand and felt as I did at the time; however, I was never alone, although it certainly felt that way. God gave me strength even when my physical & spiritual body were weak. During one of my darkest days, I felt God starting to move in me and spoke to me. Why should I be depressed? I had Him on my side and that this was only temporary. My sickness was not a negative but just opposite. From that point forward I realized that it was not a punishment however a pivotal moment in my life. That He was going to be glorified through me. Wow I was chosen to help God?! It was not going towards my story but His. My faith was renewed. My frustrations became happiness, I didn't feel lonely but known. I then enjoyed and looked forward to going to chemotherapy sessions. Showing that God had a purpose for all this pain and sorrow. God strengthen my faith so much I began openly professing my faith to others in the hospital. So much so that I began asking my doctors and nurses to pray with me before sessions and surgeries.

A few months passed and my cancer started to shrink, I started thinking to myself, my time is almost over. I can pull all of this behind me, and NEVER think of this again. Boy was I wrong. My walk wasn't almost over but just beginning. "My Story" is not something you can just tuck away, God didn't just put me through hell just to forget. He asks us to share our trails with others for that He will be seen in the unseen. Till this day I thankful that I was able to experience Cancer and wouldn't trade it in the world. But it's not just all smiles and rainbows. Even now there is a high percentage of reoccurrence. A normal physical is not just a physical but a worrisome event hoping and praying that nothing would appear. Even if it does shown up again what can we do but just be faithful and know that He is with us and that in our weakness, His strength is revealed.